After the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, it appeared that the Nation was on the verge of social and racial healing. 51 years later, it feels as if someone yanked off the scab of the wound of racism unceremoniously and suddenly. Within the last 8 years after history was made, the tension is thick and like a vision chart, people are walking around seeing black and white. Was it all just an act, just to say that it had been done? That a man born to a white mother and Kenyan father ran for President of the United States and actually won? The ‘N’ word is being used freely and worst has become legitimized by we the descendants of a race of people whom this term was used to marginalize, demoralize and defame. This word is as deadly as it is sacrilegious as it was often the last word that men and women with black skin heard seconds before their lives were taken. There was no prayer or last rites; today we use the word freely asthough it has no stereotypical personification. Others use the word especially because of the loaded connotation it possesses. Both sides callously defending the usage while having no semblance of feeling contrite.  

The scab has been pulled off and the modern intentions are as blatant as the days of Jim Crow. There is no escaping the realization that the wound is hemorrhaging hate and intolerance and it is as toxic and putrid as ever. Sadly, I long for the days of censorship of mainstream television or so-called public television in terms of what could be said versus what was implied. Who would have ever thought that watching a Presidential debate in the year 2015, there would be minimal effort to disguise the hate? Alternatively, watching the sitting President be heckled, disrespected, and dishonored for the world to see during press conferences, official addresses, etc. We are indeed making history again yet we are regressing in the wrong direction. A visit to just about any Internet social media, gaming site or whatever, is akin to attending a hate rally. It’s a vehicle in which anyone can say anything about anyone thereby misconstruing bigotry and futility as being protected by the 1st Amendment.

The irony is beyond comical that so many who are currently running for an Office that some of these Presidential hopefuls have disrespected so grossly during the last 7 ½ years. Why run for an office that you have so little regard for? Of course, some may argue that they were criticizing the man; this man is the President of the United States and the people elected him to public office. If you do not like him, fine; you and everyone else will have a chance to cast your (our) ballots for the next President. Until such time and as everyone else has had to do at some point in their adult life…deal with it and when you have an opportunity to change something…change it. Until then, change the way that you think! Please stop trying to control everyone else through anger, intimidation, erroneous information, and hate. A righteous platform does not have to work so hard to be righteous.  

When you disrespect and dishonor the man (or woman) sitting in the Oval office, you disrespect the Office. Let’s look at it this way to further drive home my point; a uniformed law enforcement official has the legal authority to arrest, detain, and use deadly force if necessary, against any individual who does not respect their official position. If you walk into any courthouse and fail to obey the magistrate or Judge, you can and mostly likely will, be held in contempt of court for failure to govern yourself with the proper decorum expected for the court/Judge. These are not new rules and these are not rules that are negotiable and/or subjective for any of us to choose for whom we will extend this basic level of respect towards. Period. 

I have to believe that the presenting problem is fear. A subconscious perception of fear of a loss of control or the facade of superiority over some else. I suppose history tells us that there must be a hierarchy, hence the class system that has been in existence since before the days of antiquity. A Queen or King needs Subjects, otherwise there is no need for a monarchy; a leader needs followers, et cetera.  

There is nothing wrong with financial prosperity; there is a huge problem when there is a dominant mindset that influences and governs who deserves prosperity and who does not, or how rich someone can (or should be.) The same God that works for you works for me too!

I personally do not have a problem with wanting to live in an affluent neighborhood; to be a part of a community of responsible homeowners and residents who take pride in their property, families, et cetera. God bless you if you have two homes…a main residence and a vacation home…or more! I do have a serious problem if you are an individual who possesses these things yet believes that others should not enjoy a similar level of prosperity or lifestyle. Especially when those beliefs are fundamentally based upon another person’s race, nationality, gender, religious affiliation, sexual orientation, or purported social class.  

Maybe I am defensive; maybe I am a little too sensitive. I am just trying to figure out how my life has individually changed due to no effort of my own. How I have suddenly benefitted by being a black American woman. I suppose there have been occasions unbeknownst to me that my demographic information benefited me on some level (or some entity for doing business with me.) What I am aware of is that in school I was required to take and pass the same tests as everyone else. I am a college graduate who earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in Print Journalism; I am still paying student loans for that privilege. I did not get any grants to attend college for being ‘under-privileged’, for being black or for a being woman. In fact, I distinctly remember that I applied for a grant when I was barely earning $11,000 a year; the Financial Aid office told me that I did not qualify for a grant because I made too much money! I had to meet the same Mortgage Loan qualifications  when I bought my house, as I would presume everyone else who has recently purchased a home. The car dealers primary concern was whether my credit score met the requirements and how much I could afford to put down when I bought my car. I am paying taxes…all government, local, state and property taxes. I swipe my own debit or credit card every time I go to the grocery store and everywhere else that I need to buy something.  

So please stop withholding this critical information! If there are any benefits out there earmarked for me just because of who President Obama is, please let me know where I go to stand in line to claim those unicorn-like benefits. Like Santa Clause, I am still waiting for them to show up.  

Until such time that these mythic benefits materialize, please discontinue telling me how great my life is because of the color of my skin. My life is great because I worked damn hard to make it that way. Moreover, I continue to work at being great and will continue until I take my last breath. I am not sharing the credit for my hard work, accomplishments and success with anyone (well, maybe with my Mom…I stand corrected, Mom! I share my success with you.)

The Dixie Chicks have a song called “If I fall”, that I love. It’s a ballsy up tempo song in that the woman forewarns her lover that if she falls for him, “you’re going down with me…you’re going down with me, baby heart and all.” Girl, I get it! But in real life it doesn’t go down like this and it would behoove us all to get the memo. Namely us women. 

As I’ve matured and gained more experience in love and relationships I had to face some facts. I guess somewhere there still exists this myth that women are demure and are more susceptible to being dominated by our male counterparts.  False! What is true is that we can cry and render men defenseless; we can manipulate situations through our anger; quick wit/comeback and legendary ability to be relentless about getting what we want. Men are known to be controlling but being controlling is by no means gender specific.  When we want and need to be, no one holds more power than a woman.  

This post is not about gender or workplace equality; there are still huge disparties in salaries between how much women earn versus our male counterparts.  The misogyny in music, film and literture is alive and well. It’s shameful and I acknowledge that.  But I’m not writing about these topics at length in this post.  This post is my reality and hindsight revelations of what I have learned about life, love and romantic relationships. 

I would have saved myself a lot of pain and suffering; would have never had certain “boyfriends” if I only knew that I could not make a man love me.  Despite having sex with him; doing everything that the magazines, TV shows and soap operas suggested I should, I eventually learned otherwise.  There was nothing that I could do to influence his feelings. Lord knows that I tried. I did/have not tried everything and was not going to then or now. I am not willing to do things that don’t make me feel good about myself afterwards. I try to live my life having few regrets.  Regret governs my boundaries and why I don’t do things that I really want to do.  One primary example is children. 

I want to have my own biological children one day. I also want them to have a different experience than I did, than my Mom did, and her Mother.  I don’t think that I am better than you; than any of the women in my family. I have just learned from other people’s experiences and have chosen not to repeat behaviors that didn’t make sense to me.  I am intelligent to know that there are individual circumstances and reasons for why or how things happen. It is the truth that there are three sides to every story. The average girl who is raised in a single-parent household is only exposed to one side of the story.  She learns vicariously through the rise and fall of her parents relationship in such situations.  If Dad is a formidable opponent in that he remains undeterred, he will insist on his paternal rights.  In many cases, the mother is vigilant about securing child support, however, many fathers are not as vigilant about establishing a visitation order to accompany the child support order.   Many girls grow to become women “looking for father figures” or desperately try to secure that allusive male energy that she never really had.  I believe this is when and where a young lady learns how to “chase” men. Due to no fault of her own, a man is missing in her life and somehow it becomes her unspoken, innate mission to find what she has “lost.” 

 I’ve learned to act responsibly when having sex. Just like we are cautioned to do when consuming alcohol, this is also applicable to agreeing to share our bodies with other people. With the exception of rape and incest, we choose with whom we will have sex with. I’ll say it again. It is a choice.  Negotiations regarding the terms of sex should commence  before the act, not after. If you have the balls to have sex with a man outside of having a real commitment with you, that is your choice.  All choices have consequences, positive or negative. 

And if it so happens that the man you’ve been intimate with is later proven to be unfaithful, he made a choice; you and only you get to decide what you should do next for you, so that you can continue to honor yourself.  It’s not about him. If he lacks integrity; is a cheater, a liar or whoever he reveals himself to be, you have to decide if being with someone like him makes you feel good about you when you’re with him. We get stuck on how we feel about him. How much does it cost your self-esteem and self-respect to give something so precious as your body and your time to an individual(s) who have no means to appraise your value? No matter how you try to convince yourself of otherwise, this does not feel good to you.  You can lie to everyone else, become defensive because you have been triggered; that’s perfectly fine. You only hurt you when you refuse to honor your truth.   

I used to lack patience inside of a relationship.  My Mother used to tell me when I was growing up, “never let a man waste your youth.”  She said this because she allowed my father who was much older than her and as she viewed it in hindsight, waste her youth.  This advice almost became a mantra for me and applied to every guy that I felt serious feelings for.  I was on the clock and so was he! No commitment after a timeframe in which I deemed to be reasonable…I was out! If we couldn’t nail this thing down in a matter of several months or whatever, I was willing to become a distant memory…to him. And no, this wasn’t the me today who is very close to kissing her 30s goodbye; this was the young lady in her 20s and early 30s! 

The bottom line is love takes time and no matter what anyone says, most people in a relationship don’t fall in love at the same time.  One person always wants it a little more than the other person, especially in the beginning.  Or you both know you feel strongly for each other, but one person needs a little more time to “start it up.”  And it’s cool. Someone once called dating the “discovery phase” and I find this to be an accurate phrase to describe what should be happening as two people get to know each other. Specifically, as it relates to whether this is your forever life-partner, spouse or whether this is someone who is only going to be in your life on a temporary basis. Women who grew up without their fathers, we are very insecure about the prospect of investing time with a temporary partner.  We perceive this as a risky, one-sided benefit for the man; he gets to get our “girlfriend experience”, try it on and see if he likes it.  If not, what the heck…let’s see what this other chick is talking about. 

Like many women, I didn’t always see the benefits of the “discovery phase” of a new dating experience. I didn’t know how to think about myself. I’m here falling all over myself, trying to impress him and influence his decision to pick me. I was barely paying attention to whether he was making an unsolicited effort to prove himself to me.  I was also inexperienced when it boiled down to understanding the difference between having similar interests and values.  I have had boyfriends who I had so much in common with it; we had so much fun together.  And because he was a man and I am woman; we have some sexual attraction or chemistry…that settles it…you’re my boyfriend! YAY!!!!!! I had no idea how immature (or under developed) my rationale was at the time.  But I am so thankful for these lessons; I am not embarrassed in the least bit. These experiences were like vitamins …like a B12 shot…they made me better! 

Similar values are the foundation of any good relationship. Today, I don’t care if my boyfriend isn’t a fan of Joan Jett; I do care if he is a good father, is financially and emotionally responsible. Whether he values commitment; whether his actions match his words.  I can find anyone to go to a Joan Jett concert…anyone can’t be my husband and father to my child(ren).  I want to take sufficient time to get to know a man; especially someone who I may spend as Dr. Laura refers to it, “between now and dead” with.  I think you know a sufficient amount of information about a person between 1-2 years of being in a committed relationship; relative to whether you have a real future together. Beyond this timeframe there is no real new information to be obtained about the other person, honestly. It is what it is at this point; deal or no deal. Only you know what “happily ever after” looks like for you.  If you are with the right partner, you both share a similar vision. 

You don’t have to force him, trap him or manipulate the situation. If you fall in love with him, you don’t have to threaten him to go down with you.  To fall with or for you. He’ll already be there firmly and voluntarily in place to catch you and to return and cherish your beautiful love.  

Probably since my mid-twenties, I wanted to purchase my own home.  My parents owned their own home, my aunts and uncles owned property therefore I always expected to follow suit. I have always surrounded myself with people who enjoyed their own measure of success. I quantify success in this way because “success” is personalized and it is perfectly fine.  My level of success or aspirations may not be anywhere near what you want or need.  Perfectly fine. The goal is to independently decide what success looks like for you and go after manifesting that goal.  And this is what the average person that I know and associate with does.  

That being said, many people saw that even in my twenties, I had been working with the same company for over five years; I was pretty financially stable with a stable income; I had also had a vehicle since I was 18 years old. The time had come for me to invest in my future and not begin the trend of making financial investments into material possessions that had no appreciable value. This then yielded conversations about my buying a home. Truthfully, I was considering buying a condo; my dream was to buy the condo, live there for 2-3 years, meet the man of my dreams, get married and buy a house with him.  

So, I began looking for condos that were within my then modest income. Again, thanking God for sending the “right” people into my life; there are so many misconceptions out there about the reality of purchasing a home. How much money you need to earn, credit scores, down payments; whether to take a new homebuyers class; how to get “free money” or assistance with securing a down payment; PMI (Private Mortgage Insurance), and the list goes on. And this is a very formidable list that succeeds in intimating eager potential homebuyers from ever starting the process.  I, on the other hand, was encouraged to personalize my experience.  I was empowered that based upon my income, I could afford to buy something that was right for me at that the time. And most importantly, it was free to look at potential listings so that my conscious and subconscious mind could eventualky sync up.  

My very first attempt to become a homeowner began with working with this very nice Realtor, whose name I cannot remember (sidebar, I will use little if any names in this blog anyway); she was referred to me by an acquaintance and her credentials came to me highly praised. We had an initial conversation which covered the preliminary items such as my preferences, price point, financials, etc.  After which she went to work putting together listings that we went to see shortly thereafter. 

It was not long before we went to see a recent conversion (the listing was an apartment in a building that had been recently purchased and the individual apartments were converted to condos.)  It was located in the South Shore neighborhood of the South Side of Chicago; South Shore in the early 2003-2005 was going through a major gentrification process. Located along the shore overlooking Lake Michigan, there were apartment buildings akin to the pre-war buildings found in New York City; these properties boasted timeless architecture, spacious apartment space square footage, views and close proximity to public transportation as well 20 minutes or less to downtown Chicago. 

I walked into the quaint space which offered two bedrooms, a sun-filled living room, a size able master bedroom, decent kitchen space and overall good “starter home.”  The neighborhood and building was safe, I had a parking space; all of the attractive amenities that a young, single woman would desire and need. I decided that I wanted this place and would make an offer.  Fast forward, the deal was not meant to be. Despite finding the right Realtor, finding the right condo, finding the right mortgage lender through a referral from a good friend, the deal stalled. The mortgage representative with whom I had been working with suddenly went on a leave of absence and as it turns out, no one thought to reassign her workload. So, I went on with life. Eventually, I applied and got a promotion to move to New York City, which was my number one dream but never thought would become a reality for me. 

It was February 2006 and I had signed my offer letter and returned it, thereby officially accepting the job in NYC.  Literally a few days later, I received a call from a man who identified himself as the new mortgage representative who had taken over my loan at the bank.  Okay…I thought to myself. After weeks of calling the bank previously for loan status updates, being told that my original mortgage rep was unavailable, I literally forgot all about them and had decided to literally, move on to the next phase of my life.  The man was excited to tell me that the mortgage company had decided to APPROVE my mortgage loan.  Yay (slow clap), as my mind quickly mustered up enough excitement to mirror his; my ego was happy and it was definitely an intense feeling of accomplishment to have been approved for a mortgage loan before the age of 30 years old. Then I had to break the news to him…I was moving to New York City and would not need the loan.  He was deflated and seemed a bit perplexed; in his world, how many people turn the bank down for a mortgage loan? 

Fast forward, I was now living in New York City and the itch to realize my dream of homeownership persisted. In 2009, three years after moving to NY, I enrolled in a first time homebuyers workshop.  For a number of weeks, after working hard at my HR job, I would travel home on the subway, go to my apartment, get my car (playing a very risky form of Russian Roulette by moving my car from its parking space, having the very real possibility that the space would not be there when I returned.  Which would then mean that I would have to risk the possibility of parking on another block, which could be similar to parking in a completely different neighborhood, depending upon where you lived.)  The sacrifice was real but I was committed to buying a home so I went with it. 

To sum up my experience overall of attending the first time homebuyers seminar, it was informative at times but not the best use of my time.  I gained key information about ensuring that you have your potential home fully inspected by a licensed home inspector before proceeding with the deal. I was underwhelmed with some of the “common sense” commentary reminding us that a mortgage loan was something that must be repaid.  Hmmm…thanks for letting me know that! I was underwhelmed by the lack of programs that purportedly provided down payment assistance. It seemed to me that these programs worked like this: Open an account with Sponsored bank, put money away towards a down payment and once you have saved enough, we’ll let you know when you have saved enough for a down payment.  Or, we’ll give you money to live in these select properties in these specific areas, of which you must personally reside in for 5-10 years before you can move. Huh?! 

After all of that, I walked away from the first time homebuyers program without a home; I did leave with a wonderful pearl of wisdom-mortgages are loans which must be repaid.  The greatest gift of the experience is that I met a beautiful friend whom I cherish and she and I remain friends to this day.  

I decided that I really didn’t need a program to buy a home. I am not diminishing the relevance or effectiveness of all first time homebuyers programs. I am speaking from my personal experience of which I am entitled to do.  Other people need this resource and find extreme value in attending these seminars. I think everyone who is so inclined to do so, should research what is available and do what makes sense for you. Me, if I have to come up with a down payment; with the new laws governing the mortgage industry, I think “free money” or no money down is obsolete. It boils down to how much you can afford to put down; assessing how much house you can authentically afford, researching lenders and seeking out as much information as you can to make an informed decision.  

A couple years later, without the assistance of a homebuyer program, I was back at it, pouring through listings trying to find an affordable condo in New York City. It is not a game in terms of how much money you need to buy any real estate in NYC.  And if you do buy, depending upon your resources, you may have to look in one of the other four boroughs; or if you insist on living in Manhattan, you will need to manage your expectations in relationship to cost and square-footage. A case in point, in 2013, if you could afford a condo costing 250K, in Harlem, you would find a few conversions with around 400-500 sq ft of living space. No assigned parking and no in unit laundry; yes, you’re either going to the laundromat or using the laundry facilities in your building. You might be able to increase your square footage by 100 or a little more in some newly gentrified areas in Brooklyn…maybe.  It is not a game.  In some cases, you can get more for your money renting in NYC than owning. It’s all about the billfolds in NYC. 

And this is what I encountered until I received another promotion in 2014, which literally afforded me the opportunity to buy a home. FINALLY!!!!!!  I had to abandon my dream of living in my beloved Harlem. The trip over the Hudson afforded me a real house with over 1,400 square feet of living space plus land. This is not how I expected my life to turn out. I did not buy my house having all of the “terms” that I had initially planned. I did get much more than I could have ever dreamed possible.  This despite the fact that I had a much different plan as well as a much more abbreviated timeframe.  

And this is one of the many life lessons that I have learned. Things that are supposed to happened will…in their rightful time of unfoldment. You will feel discouraged, apathetic, angry and you will give up or want to during your journey.  It’s okay to defer your plans but do not under any circumstances abandon them.  I have been taught that a desire placed in your heart comes from an All Knowing, Ominiscient Source that has already approved your desire. Become one with it and believe no matter what the facts seem to say about it. The truth remains unchanged and unphased by facts that are susceptible to change.  

As someone once said, the good that you are seeking is always seeking you.  Go get it and live your dreams! 

When we think about trust it often is predicated upon whether we trust someone else. The element of trust is a lesson repeated often until we “get it”.  One of my memorable trust moments came several years ago while I was in a relationship with a man whom I cared deeply for, but whom I also did not trust completely. 

I always had this nagging feeling that something was wrong but prior to this moment, I chose to ignore those cautionary feelings.  I always had this sneaky suspicion that our level of commitment was one-sided or better said…lopsided disproportionately on my end.    Yes, we had a great time together. The sex was good and how I felt about him was even better. I had not felt that I had so much in common with a man since high school, which I shared similar feelings and experiences with my then first love.  

So I was beyond excited when I met this man who loved 80s music as much as I did; was as social as I was; educated, smart and just plain fun. We had a great time together.  We were really great friends but I wanted more. Much more. 

And as time progressed, I had begun to see that he saw things differently. When I would want to discuss relationship hiccups or concerns like his intentions, etc., he would shut down completely. My heartfelt pleas for concurrence, agreement or understanding were met with responses such as, “I don’t know what to say about that…”   Long pause followed by…nothing. 

And then opportunity struck.  I found that I didn’t trust him around a particular woman; when the three of us were in the same room I did not appreciate how I experienced the odd, inexplicable uncomfortable vibe that I was definitely feeling. It seemed to be equally uncomfortable for them also-though I wasn’t sure why.  It often felt as if there was or had been something going on between them but I couldn’t figure out what it was. Had they been “together”? Were they together at the time and unbeknownst to me, I had thrown a monkey wrench in their path? I didn’t know and obviously he wasn’t owning up to anything other than she was one of the many women he knew.  Innocent enough, right? 

I never thought myself to be an insecure woman.  In hindsight, when you’ve known a man less than two years, let alone less than 6 months (as was the case with this guy), you really don’t know him well and he doesn’t know you.  Real talk.  Anything less than two years is what some refer to as the “discovery phase”.  I did not know it then but this is the timeframe when the Sunday shirt comes off; as does the rose-colored glasses.  This is the exact time when EVERYTHING should and needs to come out if a promising future together is on the horizon.  So back to feeling insecure. I was not an insecure woman by any means, but the truth is I did not know him well and therefore his (and my) trust bank had insufficient history.  

I did not have enough information to say affirmatively that “this woman is no threat to your relationship, Stephanie. He loves and is committed to you.” In hindsight I was feeling the reality that a real commitment did not exist between us. At least not at that point.  Which meant that any woman was fair game and I felt that (in hindsight) and I was therefore triggered.  Nonetheless, in my gut, I knew that whatever it was, “something” was NOT right.  

And then it happened. One day before a weekend getaway to his alma mater; a trip that included his two young teenage daughters and preteen niece, the 5 of us were going away together.  I was excited and in typical “girl” fashion, I began with my customary relationship mental equation, “this means that.”  The equation goes like this, “if he is taking me with him to meet his college buddies, with his daughters and niece in tow, this means that he is serious, that we are serious. It means that our relationship is progressing.” My relationship math needs a little work because it does not quite work that way.  

So before leaving on the trip, I found an email between my boyfriend and the woman. I discovered that he pretty much was initiating contact with her and unfortunately, yes there were sexually explicit emails detailing what he wanted to do to her.   And because emails have dates these correspondences were sent while he and I were together.  So all of the while, I’m sensing distance between he and I and this is partially why.  I do not blame her at all because from what I could tell she was wearing the catchers mitt; he was the pitcher. Furthermore, I was not in a relationship or even friends with her; she did not betray me.   He did with his dishonesty.   I was devastated and though I went on the trip, I was heartbroken and did not come anywhere close to having a good time.  There have been very few times in my life that I can remember feeling helpless and as if I did not know what to do.  And that was one of those times. 

After I recovered and took my power back by confronting him; quick sidebar, because of how I “happened” upon this information, I had to tread lightly.  My own unscrupulous behavior of looking at his email rather than closing it caused me pain.  I caused myself pain because I needed proof outside of myself.   I needed to validate my instincts versus trusting what I had already known by feeling. My intuition had already told me that something was not right, but I needed to be a “cutter” and become a Private Investigator at the same time.  Too much work which in the end that did not help things at all.  There was no payoff beyond my being right.  

Several years later, I am grateful for this experience because it taught me extremely valuable lessons about men, relationships, love and me.  Today, if my boyfriend leaves his email open, I will close it if I have to use the computer after him. Even if it’s my computer; it’s his email and it is off limits the me unless he asks me to read something.   And the same rules apply for phones or anything that does not belong to me.  And obviously the same principle applies to me.  

I am a grown woman and I have a right to ask any man with whom I am in an intimate, committed relationship with what the deal is. And if he cannot or will not give me the straight answer I deserve,  this gives me just cause to cease trusting him…or better yet leave him.  Period.  At no time does this translate into an occasion to stop trusting myself.    I do not have the time nor interest to become a super sleuth and look for answers that I can get by opening up my mouth and asking for what I need.  No man has the ability or authority to shut me down. Ever. And I won’t allow it. And neither should you or anyone else. 

Trust yourself always.  No man or woman is worth you stooping down to the level of diminishing your character (and integrity.) Ask for what you want, ask questions until you are clear.  If the other person loves and respects you (the relationship and his or herself), they will do whatever it takes to contribute to your happiness.  

Hello there, Stephanie is my name and I am blogger. I tried my hand at blogging before but I abandoned it many years ago.  As a Print Journalism major, I considered myself to be a serious writer. A professional writer. No one who like myself, paid to learn the difference between “style” such as the difference between Associated Press or AP Style versus Chicago Style, would ever consider blogging. I previously aspired to be a great investigative reporter. To report the news, i.e., the facts and nothing but. No Op Eds…no gossip columns. Yet, here I am. I am not interested in chasing elusive celebrities, politicians and subjects who never agree to an interview…unless of course, they are promoting something.  It’s contrived and I don’t have interest in the dog & pony show.

The landscape of blogging has changed dramatically since I graduated from college. The way we access information or the news is revolutionary and appealing to the masses. Information is instantaneous. We no longer have to wait until the 11PM news broadcasts to find out what happened 12 or 2 hours ago. We are no longer startled away from our regularly scheduled program to be rudely interrupted with breaking news content we may not care about. Today, we can get news we want, when and how we want it. From bloggers, not reporters, but from regular people like us.  Anyone and everyone can become a SME on something. Which oddly gives more credence to “man on the street” on-camera interviews.

This is not our parents news. Our parents have yielded to our news and the manner in which we communicate to and about the world in which we live.

So, I said all of this to say-I’ve started my blog and I have a vision for this platform. I know what I want to say; I have an opinion about everything. I’ll meet you here as often as possible. I hope you enjoy this experience. I will do everything possible to ensure that you have a rymarkable time when you visit my blog.