Though I’ve never been pregnant, I’ve gone through several periods of gestation followed by intense labor pains.  Like most women who have given birth unanimously comment afterward, I quickly forget about the strenuous pushing; intense discomfort and stress once I have given birth. In my case, once I have given birth to a Dream. 

I have given birth to many dreams in my life.  However each time I’ve been pregnant with those dreams, I forget about the process of giving life to those dreams.  As a result, every dream is akin to a first-time pregnancy in which I forget about everything I learned from each previous experience. Thus, I get caught up in the process or the journey of bringing a dream into fruition.  I lament that it takes too long. Why aren’t things going my way? Why am I in so much pain? Why do I feel so alone? This is too hard! Am I really ready for my life to change once this dream is realized? What if I am not good enough to support this dream? What if I fail? Do I really want this dream or am I just infatuated with the idea of it? I panic and start convincing myself that I am not ready. 

I am not ready! WAIT!!! Please wait. Que consecutive contractions that intensify by the second. 

It doesn’t matter now Stephanie whether you are ready. It is time.  

Here I am in labor again. The stakes are even higher than the last time.  I am acutely aware of the other dreams that have been granted. Their continued survival is dependent upon me making smart choices today and moving forward.  I must resist the impulse of emotional decisions.  I have to make moves in a mature way. Which often reads as safe.  To do nothing.  To stop conceiving big dreams. To opt for the safer ones. The smaller dreams.   The ones where people are more likely to accept those dreams versus the so-called grandiose dream or dreams that God has given me. 

It’s like when you already have multiple children and you share that you’re thinking of having more.  The look of disdain or shock is enough to make the most confident woman second guess herself.  The same is often true when you already appear abundantly blessed to friends, family, and other onlookers, when you boldly share that you dare to desire “more”. MORE?! 

Since when is greed on par with healthy ambition or divine Purpose? And who gets to decide between the two for you or for me? 

What I am learning is everyone cannot comprehend your life’s manifest destiny.   You also have to remember to keep your eyes on your own paper.  Just because the people around you are content with what they have, doesn’t mean that you are compelled to adopt this mindset for yourself.  Just because someone whom you love, admire, or respect is satisfied being the CEO of a company, doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t strive to be the president or the chairperson of the company-if this is what you really want.  

On the highway of life, sometimes you have to stop following the car ahead of you.  Sometimes the car ahead is going too slow or too fast. It has guided you to the point or destination that it was supposed to. The time has now come for you to change lanes; sometimes you must safely pass and continue your own way.  The people who genuinely have your best interest at heart will understand the vital necessity of when paths must splinter off towards individual expression.  Others may not be able to completely support you with their presence; they may have to love you from a distance. Or you must learn to love them from a distance and move forward.  

I’m in labor.  I will give birth to this unique dream or dreams conceived by my desire.  I will practice my breathing techniques. I will give my voice and sound to frustration when necessary.  I will grab hold of anything in sight to support me as the occasional discomfort sets into my body.  I will accept that I don’t know how everything will work out; I just know that it will.  It always has.  I accept that I’m not in control of every detail of the process.  I will respect the process. I will acknowledge doubt and despair however I will not yield to anything but the inalienable truth about me and my life.   I am never alone.  I am success.  I am prosperity, health and happiness.  Everything will be just fine.  

I will give birth to as many dreams as possible without guilt and without asking for anyone’s permission.